Corey Wade | @cwadepga
What is one of the most things about Christianity is that somehow we have managed to make ourselves a culture, within a culture, within a culture. What I mean by this is that: 1. We are different than the lost world (or SHOULD be), and; 2. People within the body of Christ are very different from one another (every tongue, tribe, nation, sports team, and pronunciation of Augustine). This creates a delightful subculture which has its own traits and practices that are unique, and well odd. Let me share with you some of mine. Some may refer to these as superstitions, but…………Jesus.
Don’t say the “D” word: As a young married’s Sunday School teacher this comes up a lot. The “D” word here is divorce. We can't even acknowledge its existence. If you even have this word in your vocabulary and utter it at any time, a judge will spring out from behind a pew and force you and your spouse to separate and move to differing countries. You have been warned.
Eating before the prayer: It is a well-known fact that food that has yet to be blessed is poisonous and deadly. Failure to pray before you eat will result in your being struck down Annanis and Sapharius style. God is all powerful but he CANNOT retroactively bless food you have already eaten. I'm sure of it.
You must say the bible reference to memorized verses: If you quote memorized scripture but have forgotten the exact reference, you have voided the scripture itself and caused a puppy somewhere to cry for no reason, shame on you. It’s not like the writers of scripture every forgot a reference or anything.
Hebrews 2:6-8 ESV
It has been testified somewhere,
“What is man, that you are mindful of him,
or the son of man, that you care for him?
You made him for a little while lower than the angels;
you have crowned him with glory and honor,
putting everything in subjection under his feet.”
Now in putting everything in subjection to him, he left nothing outside his control. At present, we do not yet see everything in subjection to him.
Your special seat: Now, I’m no legalist from years back and have an exact spot of a pew with my permanent cheek impression ingrained into the wood (sorry for that imagery). But I do only sit on one side of the church. I have never sat on the other side of the church and I’m not sure the Holy Spirit can find me over there. I know my crowd around me and they have never ventured to that side either. It’s basically like the “Others” from Lost.
So what are some of the quirky things that you do at your church?
Corey Wade decided to put his Biblical Studies degree to good use by becoming a PGA Golf Professional in Crossville, Tennessee. He and his beautiful wife Karyn are foster parents currently with three children that are apart of their forever family. His main hobbies include reading boring books, drinking coffee, and starting new hobbies only drop them weeks later. He secretly desires to be a reformed hipster and quote Augustine, but doesn't like the way his legs look in skinny jeans. You can contact him on twitter @cwadepga or his email firstname.lastname@example.org. Go Vols!!!
A collection of faith-based funnies for those who need a chuckle or two.